DM wants romance, gets pissed when I retaliate

A DM I played with thinks my character is female when he's actually male, and got made cause she didn't ask me after I told her he was 100% male

2 comments, 3 points

For the first time in a long while, I decided to go to a new server for DND. My normal group was all chilling for chistmas, so nobody was DMing. So, I just went to a different group for a period of time because I was bored.

The character I used for the session was named Raven, a half moon-elf wizard-druid. Now, on a joke with my normal party, Raven looks really feminine due to both his elven heritage and his signiture long hair (all a joke because everyone thought of Teen Titans every time I used him). Well, the DM for this session made the broad assumption that he was a girl pretending to be male (despite me telling her he’s male) because in this world, girls were looked down upon…. Raven is 100% male and gay (important later)

So, this Dm really likes romance, and wanted a relationship to brew during the campaign. Well, the only person in the party that COULD end up in one was Raven, mainly because one PC was ace and another was a general jerk that was hard to like.

Well, one of the NPCs and Raven got along great, both having similar interests and junk, the NPC being a human paladin named Eric. Now, gender is rarely mentioned in the campaign except when describing characters, so it was rarely an issue of my character’s gender, even more so when he looks like a girl and never really bothers to correct people until they ask.

DM decided it was a cute couple and said she shipped it. I thought ‘yeah, thats fine’, except Raven is very dense to affection. Sure, he can read emotions like anger and stuff, but he was never really exposed to affection, like flirting. The most he knows is that friends hug, that’s about it.

Well, the NPC really liked to flirt with Raven, and Raven took it as simple compliments and more or less dodged it
Ex: “You’re hair is really pretty”, to which he’d respond with “It’s a tangled mess…” or “You did great out there” with a wink and he’d just say “I could of done better.”; those kinds of responses that is deflecting a compliment.

It’s maybe five months ingame when the NPC confesses to liking Raven. Now, my party says I’m one of the best rolepayers, as I can go into the brain of my character and respond as if they were real humans without me being there. And, my character simply says “I like you to, you’re a good friend”. DM explodes, asking what the hell am I doing.

I explained that Raven doesn’t understand affection all that much, so ‘like’ to him means friends. So, the DM makes the NPC elaborate and Raven, after having a calculating-meme moment, decides to try it out, see if they were compatable with a relationship.

Aaand then it goes downhill. The NPC is really posessive and HAS to be with Raven at all times (which Raven hates, as he likes to go off on his own to meditate or take a breather, as he isn’t used to being around a large group). None of the other  NPCs notice and neither do the PCs, who just don’t really care much about dealing with it.

Well, when Raven gets onto the NPC for pretty much stalking him when he went to meditate, the NPC charisma’s his way through it (despite me rolling a nat 20 against it) and Raven is forced to just accept it and just silently brood over it.

And then the NPC AND DM realize he’s actually 100% a male. It was a random convo in an inn when the NPC asks “So, what’s it like pretending to be a guy?” and my character, being confused af, responds “Why would I need to pretend to?” Despite Raven trying to tell him, the NPC refuses to believe Raven is actually a guy instead of a girl. The NPCs way of proving it? Groping. Dm tries to play it off as me taking it too far, and tries to describe a girl’s body before I cut in and say “Okay listen here, dammit. He’s a boy, always has been. I’d have told you if he was actually a friggin girl.”

Not only was the DM pissed, but so was the NPC because Raven ‘lied’ to him (despite never saying he was even a girl). Turns out DM was pissed enough to make the NPC homophobic and basically insult Raven to hell and back because the NPC was so sure that Raven was a girl, and thats the only reason why he out up with the kid. Like jeez, 0-100 really freaking quick.

PCs get involved in game and out of game, one lecturing the DM and the other trying to figure out what the hell is going on and what’s true and what’s false. Wonder what happened to the DM, cuz i just left (though one of the PCs messaged me a few hours later that the NPC decided to just kill me while the other NPCs and PCs were forced to not intervien). Technically the first death ever for this kid after me playing as him for 4 years.


I love to share drawings of his character, so here's a (not exactly) recent drawing I did a few months back ^-^ Though I can't draw hands of feet .-. so they are numbs (he has 6 fingers :D)


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  1. Yeesh. The DMPC was warning flag enough but killing off your character out of spite? Getting out of there was the best thing to do. I hope you found a better game to play in.

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