How the Big Blue Naked Druggie Outwitted a Dragon


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This should be short.

The setup:

Me, a DMPC Paladin because my character was not ready yet, a Rogue, a Barbarian, and our hero, the Blue Genasi Wizard. To sum it up, yes he is blue. Yes, he was a Genasi. Yes, he was a Wizard. Yes, he never met a plant he did not like to smoke. Last, no, he never wore any clothes. We have been going through a dungeon, as you would expect, clearing out room after room. Soon we came to a room where we could hear loud sleep like breathing but without any sight on what was making it. In the center, there was what we would find out was a large freight elevator of sort with another passage way on the far side of the room. We tried to sneak past without disturbing whatever was sleeping. We failed.

The true story begins:

It was a dragon, adult or ancient, does not matter since he could kill us all with one attack. I, being a paladin, tried to talk the dragon down. Rolled bad. The rest started to get ready to make a desperate to survive, that is except the Genasi. He walks right up to the dragon and asked to put on a small concert for the dragon. He then castes Mirror Image so now there were four naked blue men, each playing a different instrument. The DM asked for a opposed CHA check. The dragon lost and you could see the tail tapping to the music. 

The Rogue saw the controls to the elevator and sneaks passed to examine them. He could read the instructions but could not speak it which was a problem since they were voiced activated but it was in a language the Barbarian could speak. The Genasi and dragon rolled another opposed CHA check. Dragon lost again exclaiming, “This is my jam,” and really getting into the music.

The DM told us the rolls were like a 1 and a 2 and he could have used the legendary resistance to pass but wanted to see how it would play out. Personally, I wouldn’t think a creature would use any legendary feat if there was no threat to its life.

The Rogue called over the Barbarian so he could get a look at the instructions. He rolled badly on his stealth but the dragon was so entertained, he still got over there unseen. Once he understood how the machine worked, the Rogue and Barbarian noticed something glittering behind them… the dragon’s hoard. So while the dragon was enjoying the naked one man band, my Paladin was watching in utter fear, both in and out of character, as I could see the two idiots sweeping arms full after armful of treasure into a bag of holding. And yes, there was a lot.

After the music ended, the dragon was so pleased he allowed us to leave on the elevator that floated through the roof of the room and out of the mountain. By the time the elevator fit snug against the hole made for it, like a piston in an engine, we heard the angry roar of the dragon whom we guest just noticed that the performance was not free and ran from the mountain as far and as fast as we could just in case he left his home to get us.


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