Tales From The TableTop (Episode #1)

Catch up with everything posted on All Things DnD yesterday.


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#DnD Story By: Jacob Miller

First and only time I've ever played was just one session I joined a campaign already very well on it's way. Everyone was nice and helped me make a character before playing and I decided on a half orc ranger who I wanted to make sort of a Mongol horse archer. Well to phase me in the DM had me make up a reason why I was in prison and has me in a cell in a prison the party was already raiding. The parties rouge who was an elf of some sort came in to the block my cell was in and attempted to tackle and gauge the guard. He botched it and managed to break a wand on the guard which exploded and seriously hurt the rogue. I how ever just starting my character was blown up and knocked out bleeding out. For the whole session I was just getting my turn skipped over as I slowly died until right before leaving another PC who was a giant saw me and punched me in the chest screaming something to snap me out of shock and patched me up. More or less the hulk waking up ironman when he was knocked out lol. Even though I haven't been able to return to D&D even years later that one session was great fun even being knocked out the whole time.

#DnD Story By: Robert Babaev

We were playing Tomb of Annihilation in Adventurer's League. I had a level 4 Bard who had just recently learned Suggestion (Wisdom save, target is bound to your reasonable request on a fail). We had recently had an encounter with a bunch of xenophobic lobsters, and I forgot I had it that time.

Oh well, XP is XP. But I was determined to SOMEHOW use this new spell. I didn't want it to go to waste, being the guy whose specialty is supposed to be screwing with people's heads.

We came to this statue of the maze god, which had a finger maze built into it. I forgot his name, but we all knew that good things were supposed to come that those who solves his mazes. Our barbarian wanted to take a crack at this. This was both a blessing and a curse, as the barbarian was the tankiest of our characters and could take most of the hits. Unfortunately, he also wasn't the best at investigation, which we needed to solve the maze. He failed the checks, and when he hit a dead end his finger began to glow.

He and everyone within ten feet of him (including me) was hit with a Shatter spell. The maze had Glyphs of Warding on it, as the DM told us. Our ranger took a closer look at it and found more Glyphs. Naturally, he didn't want to touch the thing after it took out half of our Barbarian's health.

But the Shatter spell also did something else: attracting a two-headed troll to our position. We rolled initiative and tried, to the best of our ability, to hit it with fire, acid or enough damage to knock it down so that it couldn't regenerate.

It was about a round into combat when I had an idea. When it came to my turn, I told everyone within ten feet of the maze to get the hell out of there. They complied, wondering exactly what I was planning.

I was sweating out of my ass in anxiety over exactly what I was about to do. Now, mind you, it was not the DUMBEST thing I've done, but it sure as hell was one of the riskier ones.

On my next turn, I cast Suggestion on the troll.

My dumb ass, after trying to intimidate a goblin, forgot some people didn't speak Common, but the DM failed the save and let it slide this time around. I told the troll to trace the maze with his finger and hit every dead end possible. At this point, the party quickly realized what I was doing.

Since this seemed harmless enough to someone who didn't know about the Glyphs, and was in fact worded in a way that it was just a weird request, the troll, puzzled, complied. He walked past our barbarian, whom I frantically signalled to not make an opportunity attack. The barbarian didn't, letting the troll pass. I breathed an internal sigh of relief, but this thing wasn't quite over yet.

The troll started to trace the maze, rolling for investigation.

The DM rolled a natural 1. The troll's finger began to glow and he was engulfed in explosive flame. Whatever spell was in that Glyph killed the troll outright.

At that point, everyone in the party was going nuts while I was laughing my ass off. It worked! It actually worked! I asked if I could have inspiration for that, because I'd been hoping to get some for nine sessions. The DM gladly gave it to me for the creative use of a spell.

I had my inspiration, the troll was dead, and everyone was happy, even if we didn't bother solving that damn maze.

#DnD Story By: Tori Giampa

So one of the fun things our DM does, is if you kill an enemy from a critical or somehow do an obseen amount of damage, the extra overkill becomes a graphic murder of some kind and you have a chance to damage other enemies too.

So I'm a Raptoran Ranger in 3.5, most of the rest of the party were melee or tanks as a whole. Only thing my party ever saw me do was shoot from the ground or the air. We came to a town looking for a criminal organization. We all did our gather information checks and ran a few errands for the town so they'd let us know even in their fear where this gang that had ruined their life was hiding out.

They'd been hiding out by using one of the more generally sketchy taverns in town to begin with. We walked in and instantly all heads turned too us and got ready to fight. Someone had been near the door and locked us in. As an archer, i got up on a table and started shooting. All the melee characters ran deeper in, and no one had ever seen me in melee, so they basically just assumed I'd shoot things to death before they got to me or oh well. I had two shots per round and a decent bow So it was possible. But locked In a whole tavern of people, highly unlikely to avoid melee.

Since i hadnt really left the door, and the rest were more the threat, only a couple enemies came after me. Unfortunately in tight quarters didn't take long for them to make it to me. So finally i had to pull out my Scythe. I'd pegged them for a bit of damage already so i went after the one who was pretty bloodied to begin with. Nat 20.

For those that don't know, scythe does 2d4 dmg and has a x4 crit. Welp, this dude was pretty hurt already, so since we wanted to have fun, we went for overkill effect.

First time ever in melee, they hear my battle cry… then watch as i chop the dudes head off with enough force to fly it into my other flanks body and kill him before hitting a simple patron and the head lands on his table.

Look at my dm and tell him i roll too intimidate. Rolled something like a 15 or so and had a decent intimidate. Half the bar, some innocent patrons and the gang we were here for, proceeded to shit themselves and cower for the rest of the battle. My archer took out half a bar fight with one melee attack.

#DnD Story By: Christopher Kit Burns

Here is a story you can use if you want. I run with a fairly messed up crew and back when we were in our murder hobo days we would often play Modern D20 in between campings. During one of those games a series of events( I don't remember what) led to the destruction of a good portion of LAX. We decided that was a lot of fun so for the next 4 years we would periodically run a one shot campaign just to see how much of it we could destroy in a single run.


I think I also need to share two stories of why I still love my gaming group. We would play multiple times a week most weeks. One time my family left on a cross country vacation and two days latter we get a phone call on my dads bag phone. ( early type of cell phone) " hey when will you get home, we are all here and set up waiting for you." They had let themselves in. After they were done they did the dishes and emptied out the perishables in the fridge for us. That almost made up for the time that one of them split my table in half with a sword. After that we had a no knifes that can't fit in a pocket rule.

#DnD Story By: John Cody Bindner

Hello so I guess I’ll put my hat into the ring on this. With a long trip into Calimport. I was first time DM with an entire party of new players. We had a halfing Wizard, Human Bard, an elf ranger, a half elf ranger, and a gnome Druid with a T-Rex for a pet. (Guy found it in the rules) They decided out of all the cities to go to they wanted to go to Calimport. Now backstory involving my previous experiences with dnd. We’ve been to Calimport maybe 2 or 3 times and nothing went right everything falls apart but the party grows into a tight nit group after cuz they all had to rely on each other. So let’s keep to tradition as they really needed to come together instead of be separated. So the goal was to try and target each and every persons vices to get them into splitting the party and go to the undercity.

Target one the bard. Easy get him to go with a “woman of service”. Finds one says she’s cheap, rolls to bluff, he sense motive. Fails. Perfect he thinks he’s getting a cheap hook up. Nope ends up owing thousands of gold and goes to the one guy who can help him, the elf ranger. Thinks it’s a joke so does help him. The bard with wishful thinking returns to the guy who controls the girl, he spares him sells him to slavery. Perfect. 

Target 2. The Druid and the half elf ranger. Guy real interested in his T-Rex offers to buys it. Keeps raising the price. Won’t sell it. (Good for him) unfortunately he’s walking around with the half elf Ranger of justice. Who sees a crook and chases him into the undercity. Druid follows even though doesn’t want to. Ends up fighting a gang of people to return the money. Well realizing he’s in a pickle turns to flee. Guy who wants to buy the T. rex shows up with his thugs. Says he can make this go away if you give him the T. rex. Ranger says yes, the Druid says no. We’ll fight ensues between the three of them. Druids T. rex gets lost in the process.

The rest of the party doesn’t fall for their vices. But now meet up with a group of homeless kids who say they can rescue both the T. rex and Bard. They easily rescue the bard and then plan to attack the caravan with the T. rex. Don’t succeed but find BBEG and his army. They end up talking in the middle of this bard blends in to his army. BBEG decides to meet up again for a trade. Bard goes back with the BBEG. Party decides to meet up again. Meanwhile bard meets the entire league of villains and sees BBEG with army kinda gets bullied a lot. He in secret makes plans to abandon them and joins the hero’s. But somehow the bard sweet talked him into giving temporary command of his army while he relocated them to fight for the hero’s. Then he goes and returns the T. rex and the hero’s get teleported to a new zone to help stop this new league of villains. Meanwhile the bard orders the entire army to sit in poison and kills his army thinking he’s helping. Then also gets teleported there. To reveal what he’s done. Immediately ranger of justice kills the bard. And thus now my new players also hate Calimport as much as I do.

#DnD Story By: Andrew Snyder

We were level one. A party of 6 mixed adventurers on a quest to find some children for a lord. We come to a bridge crossing and see something move in the bushes on the other side of the bridge. We spring into action. Our people get ready to move in. The bard (me) does an acrobatics check and spider climbs under the bridge drawing my rapier to get ready. The druid sets herself ready with her companion. The fighters draw longawords. The rogue rolls a 20 on an intimidate check and runs across the bridge screaming, "ROAR" at the top of his lungs. We hear a "yelp" and a grizzly bear starts running in the opposite direction. The DM just shakes her head as we thwart the first plan of many that campaign.

Know that this is a moderate sized elf rogue screaming across the bridge.

+8 Bork +7 marking territory +11 good boy

Corinne Zurfluh

When DnD is life

Just how much true is this?


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