That One Time My Character Was Somehow Both A Genius and An Idiot

Now, my sugar clouded mind came up with an idea, an arguably terrible one. I leaned over to the player who played as the Aasimar, and whispered the idea in his ear.


So this is a story from my DnD group. I’m really close friends with everyone in my DnD Group outside of the game.  The cast of character for this story will  be as follows: An Aasimar Rogue named Dregh, A Flirtacious Kenku Wizard who rides a Guard Drake, A Tabaxi Rogue named Arete ( my character), and, get ready, a Human Cleric named Lord Kentooky of Fried Cheekan who worships Colonel Sanders and is fated to destroy the evil lord of shadows, Ronald McDonald- Yep, our group is really weird. I should make not of the fact that the Dregh, the aasimar, and Arete, the tabaxi, were closer than the rest because they had both been enslaved by the same enterprising Yuan-Ti warlord. One thing you should know about our group is that we tend to joke  ( Which I suppose is obvious) . For some background, we once had to fight a necromancer, who our Kenku tried to seduce, but ended up being vanquished by the Holy Light of Colonel Sanders. Another time, we were wandering through a haunted forest, and the same Kenku tried to seduce a ghost and ask for It’s number- The ghost fled. For this particular story, we were in an underground cavern with two NPC’s. Can I just say, Thank God for those NPC’s. Without them, our characters would have been dead a long time ago. But this day in particular was my birthday, and I was spending it playing DnD with my best friends. This story probably turned out the way it did because I was on a sugar high from drinking way too much soda. To set the scene: We had just passed a field of toxic mushrooms, which my character, the Tabaxi, had rubbed against her claws and fangs to make them poisonous. The cavern we were in was described as huge, collossal, even. Everything was fine, despite us all suspecting a Beholder or portal to the Underdark to appear or something. Unfortunately, what we came across was much, much, worse. It was Mosquitoes. Giant, bloodsucking, evil, mosquitoes. Every hit we made did nothing to them, and their stats were impossible. Now, my sugar clouded mind came up with an idea, an arguably terrible one. I leaned over to the player who played as the Aasimar, and whispered the idea in his ear. His first reaction: ” ARE YOU CRAZY?!” Of course, me, being stubborn, pulled the It’s-My-Birthday-Card. He begrudgingly did as I ask. He narrated that: Dregh unfolded his wings, and grabbed Arete’s paw, lifting her into the air. He gained speed, and taking a deep breath, THREW ARETE AT THE FLYING MOSQUITOES OF DEATH. I had doubled over laughing, given that I was shocked he’d acually gone through with my idea. The DM gaved me this shocked and vaguely amused look, and had me roll. Nat20. The DM described as I flew through the air, claws sinking into several mosquitoes at once. I ended up killing all the mosquitoes a sustaining no damage, an event now known as the ‘Day The Cat Flew’.


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