So I'm playing DnD back when exotic races came with steep leveling penalties – nonetheless, I chose Lizardman for my warrior, and choked down the leveling penalties that came with the natural armor and huge strength and constitution bonuses. My character was named.. Grax I think.
During a rescue mission in a goblin cave, I successfully sneak up on a goblin guard (no small feat – my size and armor give me prodigious penalties, but I rolled really well) I make a sneak attack; this is as close as I can get to quoting what happened.
Grax: "I make an attack with my greatsword. I reach back behind my back, grab it with both hands and make the attack in a single smooth motion and cut him in half."
Roll: 1
DM: "Ooooh.. let me see what the chart says.."
DM Roll: Some Number
DM: "Ha! Well, the straps to your weapon break." He looks a bit smug – he tried to talk me out of being a lizardman and I think was hoping for failure.
Grax: "So.. I.. CRUSH him…" and I roll before he can say otherwise.
Roll: 18
The DM's face fell. Straps break on my weapon? Well.. I'm still swinging a six foot long, half a foot wide band of metal wrapped in leather.
We haggle a bit over damage, and finally I roll "counts as" for a greatclub, plus my strength modifier.
K.O.
And that was how I broke a goblin's neck and rescued my companions.
[zombify_post]
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